Monday, December 24, 2012

Special Battle Report

Tire the children ( that they sleep tonight!).

Local Neighbourhood.

HQ and troops only.  HQ carries a letter (but no stamps), drinks, pram/pushchair/stroller (delete as culturally appropriate), change of clothes, nappies/diapers (delete as culturally appropriate), a small amount of money, mobile phone/cellphone, and other items essential to the troops well-being. The HQ is on foot only - no tanks other than the pushchair (which is too small for him to fit in).

Primary Objective:
Tire the children!

Secondary Objectives:
(i) Visit the playground.
(ii) Visit the post office and postbox.
(iii) Stay out for 2 hrs minimum (to give wife/fieldmarshal a break).

Special Rules:
(a) if the primary objective is met before secondary (iii), the entire mission is considered a failure.
(b) if it rains, the troops must not get wet (jumping in muddy puddles also counts), or if they do AND the fieldmarshal finds out, then the entire mission is considered a failure.

HQ and troops leave the field marshall and progress in to some terrain.  Going is difficult, but the troops locate some discarded mighty Khornate chainaxes (also known as sticks).  This might not end well already.

HQ takes a wound to the left shoulder from impulsive (inevitable?) chainaxe attack.

Heading uphill, the post office is on the horizon.  HQ joins the troops unit (i.e. hold hands!).

Secondary objective (ii) achieved.  Letter stamped and posted.  Troops request to ride on HQ shoulders.  Challenge accepted.

Head to the playground.  Troops fail dangerous terrain roll and stumble over losing a wound through grazing a knee.

The game continues in the playground.  Secondary objective (i) achieved.  Primary objective achieved a little while later.  Drinks used up.

The game continues.  Troops tired and request ride in pram all the way home.  Side effect: Primary Mission achieved for HQ as well as troops.  Arrive home: secondary objective (iii) achieved.

Phew!  What luck!  It didn't rain and there were no muddy puddles.  I got really lucky considering the skies were darkening with rain cloud!

Merry Christmas from Warpstone Flux!


Vladdd309 said...

Heh heh, great post,

Hope the family have a great day!

Tim Skawinski said...

I've never heard "pram" used before. Where is that part of the vernacular?

jabberjabber said...

I think "pram" is a Victorian era word, short for perambulator. Hence, UK, Australia, etc. it is in pretty common usage.

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